We will talk about what emotional intelligence is, why it is so important to increase it and how you can apply it in life.
What is emotional intelligence?
Emotional Intelligence (EQ) is the ability to perceive, control, and critically evaluate emotions. Both your own and the emotions of other people. Someone thinks that this is a unique innate skill, others say that emotional intelligence can be developed.
The ability to monitor and manage your emotions is an important skill both in everyday life and in your career. The ability to read and respond to other people’s emotions is also highly valued in the work environment. These are all closely tied to emotional intelligence and help people build more successful careers (and lives).
Why is emotional intelligence so important?
Because EQ is used in different spheres of life. Increased emotional intelligence can affect a person’s academic and professional success. It allows you to show leadership qualities, find contact with different people and lead them along. And also to convince them that they are right.
Developing emotional intelligence is beneficial for physical health. It helps to work through stressful situations and reduce their impact on the body.
Also, uncontrollable emotions can lead to the manifestation of psychological illnesses. More often than not, not dealing with your feelings leads to anxiety and depression. Developed EQ helps to avoid such consequences.
Having developed emotional intelligence, it is easier to understand other people, perceive their emotions, express sympathy, choose the right words, etc. Together, this helps to build closer and more reliable relationships with colleagues and loved ones.
The ingredients of emotional intelligence
EQ is an entity made up of several distinct skills. They are interrelated, but develop separately. They can also be present in one person, but in different proportions.
The human task is to analyze each component and subject it to critical evaluation on a regular basis.
As I said above, emotional intelligence helps to establish and maintain contacts. This is especially important in professional activities when creating new business relationships, communicating with partners, etc.
Also, developed communication skills help build more productive relationships between employees in the same office. They can ask for help and verbally resolve any conflicts.
A boss with a heightened EQ can raise serious issues and support the team’s discussion, producing positive results from that discussion (for example, making a decision on an issue that concerns the entire office).
This essence is closely related to EQ and is often included by experts in emotional intelligence. Motivation means the ability to set goals and achieve them.
It is due to motivation that the desire to perform certain tasks is formed. A good motivator can motivate an entire group of people to complete even extremely difficult tasks.
And motivation also makes it possible to better cope with setbacks, assess the situation, and return to work.
The most important part of developed emotional intelligence is the ability to read other people’s emotions and plan your actions based on how other people feel. The correct interpretation of emotions makes it possible to choose the best time for making difficult decisions. Employees with developed empathy are able to anticipate the reactions of others and avoid possible problems and conflicts.
Concern about other people’s thoughts and feelings in the team creates a healthier and more humane atmosphere in it. In today’s society, as trite as it may sound, this approach helps to increase productivity, reduce overall stress and anxiety, and reduce turnover by providing a comfortable work environment for everyone.
This skill gives a person the opportunity to recognize himself as part of a team and learn how to work with other people. This type of responsibility obliges a person to be responsible for the decisions made and the overall result of the work. An important skill for those planning to take a leadership position.
Feeling responsible for the outcome of the activity, each employee will try to do the maximum so that the team does not “fail”. There will be no anchor staff who think that everything will be decided for them.
Ability to control and level conflicts
Another aspect of emotional intelligence that is highly regarded in the professional environment. The ability not only to smooth out conflicts, but to resolve them, clearly aware of the causes and consequences.
Collectives consisting of such workers show high efficiency in even the most difficult situations. Productivity increases, any destructiveness is transformed into constructiveness. Conflict is seen as a way to recognize mistakes and improve.
How do I use EQ?
You can use it in a variety of life situations.
Learn to accept criticism so as not to enter into conflicts.
Learn to cope with mistakes and constantly move forward.
Be able to say no when the situation calls for it. In everyday life and at work.
It is correct to share your emotions with other people, without inventing anything or deceiving others.
Know what exactly you are doing and why you are doing it. That is, to competently cope with goal-setting.
Be able to correctly assess the actions of other people and not judge them excessively.
How is EQ measured?
Usually, not a general metric is used, but several different ones, depending on a specific EQ component.
There is a test for assessing communication skills from Ilyin.
Test to check communication skills from Michelson.
Test to assess the level of motivation from Ehlers.
Test for the degree of motivation and fear of failure from Rvan.
The system for assessing the level of empathy of Mehrabian.
Boyko’s test of human empathic abilities.
Ilyin has a test for the degree of conflict of an individual and a test for checking the level of personal aggression.
How to develop emotional intelligence?
We need special literature. Read books on improving communication skills, books on empathy, etc. Interact with people more often and be aware of your actions.
There are some simple strategies for increasing your EQ. There are only three main actions that need to be paid attention to.
Learn to listen
To understand other people’s feelings, it is important to learn to give them enough attention. Spend your precious time with the other person and try to understand what he wants to convey to you. And pay attention not only to verbal signs, but also to non-verbal ones.
Body language is an important metric for assessing a person’s behavior, intentions, desires, etc. Emotionally intelligent people can read this language correctly and understand other people better.
The ability to understand other people’s feelings is a critical skill in business, but equally important in everyday life. The skill to feel yourself in someone else’s skin allows you to objectively evaluate the actions, words and decisions of other people.
Only with a sufficient level of empathy can one correctly assess the intentions of other people. And knowing this information, you can adjust your behavior so that each communication ends in success. For example, do not go to a person who is clearly out of sorts, or stop speaking if the interlocutor feels discomfort.
Reflect on your own emotions
This skill will help you not to go crazy. You need to live in harmony with your feelings. Track the moments when emotions take over and force you to make decisions that have not been clearly analyzed before.
To the extent of control, to the extent of analysis. Do not try to suppress everything, but learn to manage it. Here’s your challenge as EQ evolves.
It is also important to understand why certain feelings force people to make decisions. This will allow not only to get along better with colleagues and loved ones, but also to anticipate some of their decisions, coupled with habits.
Potential Difficulties for People with High EQs
In fairness, it is necessary to mention the possible disadvantages of heightened emotional intelligence. Balance is required everywhere, and too high an EQ can be just as dangerous as too low.
Scientists have confirmed that people with high EQs often have low creativity and do not generate innovative ideas.
People with an increased level of empathy do not know how to express criticism, which complicates their lives, completely ignoring the shortcomings of other people because of their fears.
And most importantly, people with high EQ are often used for their own purposes. Manipulation schemes of interaction are used.
Instead of a conclusion
That’s all. Develop your emotional intelligence. Its increase will bear fruit in all areas of life – from personal relationships to professional activities.